MSNBC Releases Joy Reid, Calls Her Message “Outdated”


“Joy Reid has been officially released as a team member with MSNBC.” That was the subject line of an empty email that went out to every employee at NBC Global, which includes Universal Studios, AT&T, and Lego Land.

“More than 19K people saw that email,” said Public Relations Director Joe Barron, “so there’s really no going back.”

Barron confirmed that Reid had worn out her welcome at the network and that her ratings reflected an “outdated message.” He says that while MSNBC remains committed to staying woke, even they have their limits.

Low ratings, for one. Reid’s show, which had a few viewers at one point, basically goes out to an audience of liberals who watch clips of the highlights on TikTok. “That’s not a successful business model,” said CFO Art Tubolls, “Joy had a chance to really gain followers but she went full Marxist instead. They scan her show for sound bytes the way they used to for Jon Stewart. Joe Scarborough is the future.”


Several sources have already disputed the future that somehow belongs to Joe Scarborough, but admit that Kellyanne Conway’s husband whatshisface would make a great addition to the show.

“She’s really not into it,” said her publicist, “but thank you.” No, thank you, ma’am, and God Bless America.